Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Yet Another Winter Storm Warning!!! (Where is Summer??)

Oh my. It is about 1235am and I should be asleep but I got to messing around on my computer for work and thought I would write on my blog for a bit since I haven't for about 1 1/2 weeks.

Yes, we are under another winter storm warning and it is really coming down! We had mostly snow earlier, and now we are having some sleet, then back to more snow. They are calling for a total of about 8-11 inches here in my county, depending where you are in the county ( I don't know why that makes a difference). They just announced that The Ohio State University will be closed tomorrow because of the weather and they never close! And I mean never!

Well, it seems a lot has happened, good and bad since I wrote last. I hinted when I wrote last that my knee was killing me. Well, its my right knee, not my left knee (the bad knee). I fell here at the house on the 17th of this month. It swelled and bruised badly right away. I thought I had just bruised it badly, but by Sunday afternoon, it was hurting pretty badly. I had my Discover New Life class to attend that night, so I hit an urgent care over by the church. They did x rays and said nothing was broken, but the doc never really moved my leg around or tried to feel around the knee or anything. They just wrapped it up and gave me some pain killers and sent me on my way.

Well, that Monday (MLK day), I managed to make it to the store for a few things. But by that late afternoon, evening the knee was burning which I knew wasn't right. I called my doc after hours and she called me right back. She had her nurse set me up to see the Sports Medicine Doc the very next day, which was great. I good and dear friend came and took me, because by this time, it hurt very badly to drive with that leg. Well, the Sports Med Doc looked it over good and suspects I have torn my MCL, and no telling what other damage. I am having an MRI this Monday (2/2) to see how bad the tear is and what other damage I might have done. That will tell us whether or not I will have to have surgery. Fun. I have been through this before with my left knee almost 3 years ago to the month.

I was supposed to have the MRI this past Saturday, however, I had had a migraine since last Thursday! Where did that come from? It turned out to be a 4 day migraine, when my dear friend called between services from church this past Sunday and said 'I think 4 day is enough don't you? And I, of course, said yes'. It has just been too much. So, she took me to the ER that afternoon. We were there till about 330-4am, but PTL, they finally found a medicine that got rid of the headache. They gave me 3 rounds of different kinds of medicine, until this last bit finally did the trick.

So, because I have been on crutches and unable to drive (although I did for a little bit today; its still very painful to do that), I dropped out for this quarter from school. I was very disappointed, but didn't know how I could do it, with or without surgery, it is still going to take a while to heal and I definitely could not see my trying to drive or get around campus on crutches. I am filling out paperwork that is requesting a tuition refund because I missed just about all of the cut off dates for dropping classes and getting money back. It may take them up to 6 weeks to decide whether I get more than 25% back, but a little more than that is better than nothing.

The good thing about all of this is that I am able to rest and really collect myself. I just felt so rushed into this quarter and felt like I could not 'get my feet under me', so to speak. This will also give me time to get into a good groove with work and help my boss get things up and running real well before Spring Quarter starts. So, I have tried to look at the good through the bad.

I know that the devil is just attacking me in a major way because of opportunities that I have had presented to me lately through Church etc., as well as other things, and he (the devil) is just trying to get me down and keep me down and I am not going to let him. I have had a lot of people praying for me, not only healing physically, but also spiritually, that the Lord will just kick that ole devil off my back. Those are the last words I speak before I go to sleep at night since all of this started happening: "Lord, thank you for getting me through another day. Thank you for my migraine finally going away with the help of the doctors at the hospital and that it has stayed gone away. And Lord, keep that devil off my back and away from me. In Your Name, I demand the he (the devil), will go away and stay gone."

Whew! It has been a very trying month in so many ways. Just so many ways. I have been hurt by several people this month in ways that I thought I would never be hurt; and that has been hard to deal with. But, I am just leaning more and more on the Lord and letting Him heal me from these hurts and help me to get over them and not to hold them against these people.

I have decided to join New Life as a Member. I am meeting with one of the associate Pastors this Friday morning to talk about some personal stuff, and he will also be doing my membership interview at that time as well. I have been presented with some opportunities that will require my membership there and I just felt that it was time. The Church as a whole has been so supportive and helpful during the past 7 or so months; I truly feel led to be there and blessed by the Lord to have found such a great Church. I have also had the opportunity to talk to kids at school about the Lord and witness to them, which has been awesome to do; truly led by the Lord.

My mom is coming up later this week to stay with me till we get my knee to a good place. If I have to have surgery she will stay through the surgery and the follow-up therapy. If I just have to have intensive therapy, she will be here through that and help me with the therapy as well as get the house organized (which it desperately needs) more organized. I am looking forward to her coming and being here with me for a while. One of my Aunts will be over sometime this weekend too, just not sure on the timing yet. But, either way, it will be great to spend some time with her; we haven't seen each other in quite a while and she said on the phone tonight that she was looking forward to seeing me and spending some time with me.

Well, I guess I had better get going for now. It's after 1am and I have some things to do in the morning before work tomorrow afternoon. I worked several hours today too. And we have small group tomorrow night, then my mom will be here! I am so excited for her to come up and spend some time with her and also to see my Aunt this weekend!

Ok, I have the perfect song. Hang on while I find it; I will be back. It's by Sugarland (whom are awesome in concert!). Anyway, I just love this song and it makes me feel so good when I hear it on the radio or CMT, I bought the CD today.

Here it is, enjoy:
"Love" by Sugarland
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoZLoLD-AWM

'I say it's love.....'

Night ya'll

Monday, January 19, 2009

It's Still Snowing!!!

It's about 315am. The dog woke me up about an hour ago; I don't think she is feeling well. I am trying to keep an eye on her, but need to get back to sleep and try to get some rest. My knee is killing me.

It is currently 11 degrees and still snowing off and on. I don't think its ever going to stop, really. I am sick of it already. I have about 9 inches or so in the backyard. It comes up over the tops of my boots when I walk the dog; need to get some taller boots tomorrow (today). Anyhow, they are forecasting snow at least every day through Wednesday of this week; then I think we get a break for a day or two, then it starts up again. What a thrill (not).

I went to a Discover New Life class earlier this evening. It was interesting. Some of it, I don't believe in; most of it, I don't have problem with it. We'll see. I want to talk to a few people and one of the Pastors' before I make a decision. I thought they were going to feed us at the class, but they didn't. So, I stopped at Subway on the way home and got just a sandwich (have chips and soda here at the house).

I got my hair cut this past Friday. Had her take about an inch or more off. It had gotten really long and cutting it perked up my perm a little. I got the perm a little before Thanksgiving, so I am really hoping it will last till Spring Break (end of March) but we will see. Feels better having finally managed to get it cut.

I've got to get to Walmart tomorrow and get a few things, food wise. Need a few other things too; need to look at their shredders and decided which one I want and how much I want to pay. Need to look at alarm clocks and whether or not I want one I can plug my IPOD into, once I get an IPOD. Want to look at new curtains for the kitchen (which means I need to measure the windows); just a few other things.

Well, I think I am going to check on the dog and try to get some rest, just in case she needs help later on. Keep her in your prayers.

Since it is really just plain freezing cold out there; and snowing and snowing and snowing: I think I will look at some songs to take us away to the islands or the beach etc. Be back after I find some.

"Everybody Wanna Go to Heaven" by Kenny Chesney and the Wailers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjaImNS_DSo

"Surfin' USA" by The Beach Boys
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbRKfieMsdQ

"Summertime" by Kenny Chesney
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vSRa-qlKTo

"Love" by Sugarland
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQPdXU_Co-k

"Mud On the Tires" by Brad Paisley
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72UmO0-LtVs

Ok, that's it for now. Hopefully it helped ya'll forget about the snow and cold for a little bit. It did me, although I'd give just about anything to be on a plane tomorrow to somewhere where its warm and there's a nice sandy beach with warm ocean water waitin' on me.

Night ya'll....

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Just Life...and Missing The Beach

Here it is the 3rd Saturday in January already. This month is just flying by, it seems like. Much like last year. I guess it seems like that when you are running at a pretty fast pace. I would rather it be like that, than just dragging by.

As of last week, my soon to be ex has been gone for 7 months. I am to the point where I don't even miss him anymore. The marriage is over, I know that it's over, that is that. We had a big fight last week, which now seems forever ago. I said some things and so did he; then he proceeded to cuss at me and told me to you know, using the f-word. We were in the basement at this point so he could look at the dryer, I put my hand on his chest to stop him from running up the stairs and out the door after he said that to me, telling him he could not speak to me that way in my house. I thought he was gonna hit me then, he was not happy that I touched him to stop him and told him that he could not speak to me that way.

He was supposed to come over this coming Monday to help me start going through things. Well, now he won't come without someone with him (he wanted to bring his dad). He said he wasn't going to end up in jail because of me (where in the world did that come from?). I asked him not to bring his dad, or anyone for that matter, because there are things we need to talk about and emotions I figured we would go through as we sorted through things. He wouldn't do it. So, I told him to forget about coming. I would take care of everything and ship his stuff over to him when I was done with it. He wasn't happy with that either. Nothing I do is the right thing anymore, and frankly, I am done trying to please him. He's making me the bad guy; every thing is my fault.

I don't understand this jail business unless he is afraid he will get mad enough at me for whatever reason, to hit me (like during out fight last week), then he knows I would call the police and he would end up in jail. But, that is his problem, not mine. If he's not grown up enough to control himself and is afraid he'll harm me, that's his problem to deal with, not mine. So, why do I feel like the bad guy and why am I being punished for it? Some days when I have had to talk to him or see him lately, he's been just as nice as could be, and other days, it's like this monster of a person who can't wait to bite my head off and blame every thing that is wrong in his life, on me. I don't get it.

We saw the mediator who is handling our dissolution on November 7th of last year. He has had our info since then. We have both emailed him with small changes and he emailed us about mid-December, apologizing that it was taking so long and that he would have our first rough draft to us in a week or so. Nothing since. I called him this past week, and got his voicemail of course, so I left a message asking him where our stuff was and why it was taking so long? We had originally said we didn't think we'd file till around June or so of this year in order to give me time to find a job and figure out health insurance etc. Well, I have a job and the benefits are coming, so we don't need to wait till June and I told him so; that we didn't want to wait til June.

He has yet to call me back or even email me. I am getting pretty aggravated with him and this business of getting our paperwork done. He's supposed to get us a first draft to look over for a week or so, then email him with changes (if any) and then he'll add the changes, we meet to sign the final copies and that's it; we can file any time after that that we want. I don't understand what's taking him so long? He's had 10 weeks (almost 3 months) to do just our first draft, so where is it? If it's taking him this long to do just the first draft, I pray there are no changes, cause we will never get this thing done then; and I think both of us (soon to be ex and I) need it to be done sooner rather than later. I'm gonna give him till this Thursday (that will make it a week since I called him) and then I will call him again; and keep calling till I get some answers.

It has been so cold here. I don't mean normal winter temps, I mean frigid. One day, I don't think we got above zero (0) degrees for a high. And the wind chills certainly haven't been above zero for a few days. Brrrr. I got an email from my math professor about a question I had asked and at the end of it, she said 'where is spring'? I smiled, because at this point, I want to bypass Spring and head straight for Summer! I am longing for someplace with a very warm beach, and a very warm body of water (Atlantic,Pacific,Caribbean etc) to go along with it!!

I just got another bin of the soon to be ex's stuff ready for him to get tomorrow. I was down in the basement anyways doing laundry and it didn't take long to get the bin together. I am leaving it outside for him; I wrote and told him that there was another one ready for him, that I would suggest he get it before Church rather than after, but that's up to him. It feels good to get the stuff out of here, even though its going to take me a while since its just me doing it. The fun thing is, I get to shred A LOT of stuff!! Of course, this will necessitate me buying a new shredder since our old one has bitten the dust...out to the trash it goes!! I love to shred!

School is going okay this quarter. I have felt a little overwhelmed here at the beginning, getting used to the schedule, the job (which I am slowly working into, increasing hours every week), taking care of just life things (grocery shopping, the dog, the house) and doc appointments. Course, I have had a few extra of those lately because of my back, which is doing much better by the way. I start PT this week. Was supposed to start it last week, on the day of the big snow and freezing temps; so I moved it to this week. which was no big deal. But, I feel some better about things this weekend and feel like I will have a moment to 'catch my breath' since there are no classes Monday.

Tomorrow is Church and I am really looking forward to it. Feel like I really need the refreshment this week. I am taking a class tomorrow evening called 'Discover New Life'. It doesn't mean I am necessarily going to 'join' the Church, but its a good way to get a good overview of the Church and their beliefs etc., ; more than what I have heard from people or read online. Plus, they provide free supper! So, I am looking forward to that.

Well, it's about 9pm now, so I guess I need to get going. The dog is whining to go out (I swear she can tell time) and I need to get ready for bed and think about what I am going to wear to Church in the morning. It's up to 25 degrees! Almost feels downright balmy!

Hmm, now I have to think about a song to add on here at the end. Be back. Okay, since I am right now missing the warm sand between my toes from the beach and the warm ocean, here's a song to transport all of us for a few brief minutes to that wonderful place....

"No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problem" By Kenny Chesney
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2AhaN1mi9o

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Brrrr and a Little Laugh for a Cold, Cold Day

So, its currently about 6 degrees here today with a -4 windchill. Nice. We got about 7 inches of snow ( I haven't actually measured accurately) here at the house yesterday. Every thing is a slippery mess and there were more wrecks on the roads this morning than I thought possible.

My body is not at all happy with this storm (and storm after storm pattern we seem to be in right now). My fibro is acting up and my bone arthritis is just killing me. That, of course, does not include the migraine I am currently fighting (and have been since about 530am this morning), or the cough and small fever that I have because my lungs can't handle the cold air at all. Thrilling. Ahh, the sun is trying to come out and it hurts my eyes, but I doubt it will do any good in warming us up. Tonight and tomorrow are supposed to be worse temperature wise and I am so looking forward to that!

Anyways, don't have any songs to share today, but one of my friends sent the "laugh" below in an email and I thought I would share it with ya'll. You know the saying, ' there's a sucker born every minute'; well, I would almost guarantee that there's an idiot born every second. Enjoy the laughs (and you will shake your head at some of these).

For those of you reading this that are in the deep freeze like me, try to keep warm and not get frostbite. Also be careful on the roads if they are snow/ice covered; just remember that probably half of the other drivers out there with you are those 'idiots'!

Enjoy and God Bless.

Guaranteed Your Laugh for the Day!

Number One Idiot of 2008:
I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter in to the emergency room right away.
Here's your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.

Number Two Idiot of 2008:
Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming toward them. It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing.
Here's your sign,guys. Don't get it wet; the paint might run.

Number Three Idiot of 2008:
A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote this, "Put all your money in this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK" and left. He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.
Don't bother with this guy's sign. He probably couldn't read it anyway.

Number Four Idiot of 2008:
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that; measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40.
Wise guy........But you still get a sign

Number Five Idiot of 2008:
A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber s aid he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him. At this point, the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.
This guy definitely needs a sign.

Idiot Number Six of 2008:
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.
This guy doesn't even deserve a sign.

Idiot Number Seven of 2008:
Arkansas : Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him unconscious. It seems the liquor store window was made of PlexiGlass. The whole event was caught on videotape.
Yep, here's your sign.

Idiot Number Eight of 2008:
We live in a semi-rural area, ( Weyauwega , Wisconsin ), and we recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! - I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."

STAY ALERT! They walk among us, they REPRODUCE!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Winter Storm Warning

Right now we are under a Winter Storm Warning. We have been since late last night and it will continue throughout today. Right now we are getting just plain freezing rain. I took the dog out about 915am and realized then that my driveway is nice and crunchy and slick; just full of ice and slush! Yuk! After this, we may have some sleet or just plain ice off and on and then snow. I am not sure how many inches we are supposed to get; I have heard anywhere from 1-3" to 3-5" this afternoon/evening. Nice.

This is one of those days when I wonder if I manage to get down the driveway in the car (I need to just run down the road briefly), will I be able to get back up the driveway? When I came home last night, it (the driveway) already had slick spots when I tried to come up it and maneuver the car into the garage.

Oh, thank goodness for the garage!! I won't have to scrape all of this off of it!! Its not much of a garage, just can fit the car in it, but at least its a roof over the cars' head!! I park in the garage at school too, for the same reason. One of these days I will come out of class, it having snowed a great deal, and I won't have to worry about clearing the car; just getting home!! I truly thank God for these small 'favors', truly.

My dryer is having problems. We are hoping that it is the heating element; especially since my Pops found the part for it and shipped it over-night from Kentucky on Thursday (it did arrive yesterday on time). The set is about 14 years old and they are Whirlpool. This is the first bit of trouble I have had with them all of these years. Hopefully it is the heating element (it takes forever to dry my stuff when I do laundry, but there is still a little warmth to things when I pull them out), and when my friends come to replace that this morning, that's all that will have to be done. If we replace the heating element and that doesn't fix the problem, I am told it could be possibly be the thermostat or a sensor. So , we will see. They (the set) have to get me through College and graduation. By then, I plan to have all but my school bills paid off and hopefully able to get a new set on credit (if I need to) by then, if I need it.

My car also needs some help. Evidently I have a hole or the beginnings of a hole somewhere in the muffler system. It sounds just awful and I am embarrassed to drive it with it making such a loud noise. I do not know if it is possible to perhaps put a patch on the hole or if I need to replace the whole thing. I am going to try to seek out a mechanic through my Church and see what they think. Pray that it can just be patched right now and that the patch will hold until I can get rid of the car and get something else. Thanks, ya'll.

Well, I have been given the okay to share that big news. I have found a JOB! It came through my small group at my Church (how cool is God?) and was just amazing how it all came about. When I realized that I did have this opportunity and we first talked about it, I actually cried (this was before Christmas and we were in a restaurant at Easton). I have been looking for 'that' job for so long; since the end of last July/beginning of August! It's just like my mom said: God would provide the right job at the right time, and He has! She had even said last fall when I got a little discouraged about it all, that maybe the job didn't even exist yet (little did she know!). God is just so great!!

Ok. So here is a little about the job. It is just getting started, first of all. Not just my job, but the business in general. It is called B.L.E.S.S. INC. (how cool is that?). That stands for: Building Lasting & Evolving Steps to Success. Cool huh? Our mission is: "We are dedicated to providing exceptional customer care to people in need of assistance with breaking barriers, dealing with life changes, and building to self-sufficiency." As I said, we are just getting started, but hope to be fully up and running by the beginning of February and have our office downtown set up by the first of March. It's going to take a lot of work, but God is with us. My boss and I truly believe in this and that God wants us to work together on this.

So, that's a little bit about it. I worked a few hours last week and this week and will again this coming week, steadily increasing my hours. The pay is beyond what I even prayed for; where she wants to put the office is exactly what I prayed for; and it comes with benefits!!! God does provide for all!!! He knew exactly what I needed in every aspect of this position, right down to the pay and benefits, and has provided exactly what I needed and more!!! WOW! How amazing and cool is God??

Things are a little better with the soon to be ex too. We have both made our apologies for the other night. We have talked some, though not a great deal. He has agreed to come a week from this Monday to help start working on the house and sorting through things. I appreciate that very much. Just keep us in your prayers. I am ready for this to be over with; however, at the same time, I don't want him to be my mortal enemy at the end of this either. I don't think we will be great friends (maybe good friends?), but I still hope and pray that some day we will come to a point where we can at least share a meal and talk once in a blue moon or so. But, there will be some hard times (not necessarily harsh, like the other night) before that happens and we both have a lot of healing to do yet, but that is what I hope. I want him to be well, happy and where God wants him to be.

Well, I guess that is it for now. I could probably write tons more, but I should get started on the house-cleaning and continue working on my homework. I need to find a song and I don't know what to pick for today. Hmm. Be back, going to look. Ok, here we go...

"Awesome God" by Michael W. Smith
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=38V8jnN1Kpw

Ok, this next one is kind of long, but WOW! I hope it moves you like it did me.
"Agnus Dei" by Michael W. Smith
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPBmFwBSGb0

God Bless and Ya'll Keep Safe.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Winter Quarter Begins

Well, winter quarter started this past Monday (5th). And it came with winter!!! What a surprise! Right now it is about 19 degrees with a wind chill (stressing the word chill) is about 9 degrees! So nice and cold! And there is snow on the ground. It snowed most of the day (at least down by campus it did); we don't really have that much snow, but it just makes it feel that much colder! But wait!! This next week, we are going to have highs in the teens and lows in the single digits!! How pleasant is that??? Find me a warm beach with some sun NOW!

It has been a long, long week. I am only taking 2 classes this quarter, but they are going to kick my butt. Its not that they are that difficult, just a lot of work; a lot of reading and assignments, a project, and just regular homework. Tuesdays and Thursdays are my long days and boy are they long! I am thankful, however, that my Political Science professor gives us a break about half-way through (its a 2 1/2hr class each day we meet) to get up and move around, take care of other business, whatever. So, I am glad for that.

With that and another thing that will start taking up my time on a more and more regular basis, I am going to have to drop one thing, I think. It's just too much with everything else that is going on right now.

So, today just to add to my stress (as if there isn't enough in my life already), my car decides to throw its two cents worth into the mix and start acting up. Took me about 10 minutes to get it started this morning. It was beginning to get to the point where I thought I was going to have to call for a ride so I wouldn't miss my classes, and it finally started. It hesitated on the way home, but started and then began making this awful racket. I don't know what it is, but its loud and right under my feet and I can feel the vibration in my feet on the pedals. Nice huh?? I hate that piece of junk.

I had my "independence day" over the weekend. My soon to ex was stopping over to get a few things on Saturday at a time I wasn't going to be able to be here. So, I left him a big (Rubbermaid) bin full of his stuff, clothes, pictures etc., in the kitchen for him. I left him a nice note and asked him if he would please take the bin full of his stuff. I also asked him to drop his house key in the mail slot after he locked the door and was leaving. To my surprise, when I got home later in the evening, he had taken the bin, left his key and no nasty text messages, emails or notes about it. That really surprised me; his attitude lately has left a little to be desired on my part and there have been times when he was just down right rude and mean over the holidays. But, I did that (I emptied his dresser into the bin) and asked for his key as a means of taking my life back and saying ' you can be as mean and rude as you want, I have a life and am going on with it.' IT FELT GREAT!!!

I got rid of my engagement ring over the holidays. I took it back to the store where we purchased it over 18 years ago and asked what I could do with it. So after looking around and doing some thinking, I traded it in on a nice pair of diamond earrings. It was a little difficult ( I shed a few tears in the car afterwards), but I had a friend with me, and after a few minutes, was fine. It felt great to do that too and I must say, I look great with the diamond earrings in two of the many holes in my ears! Another piece of the puzzle of getting on with my life and not letting anything he says or does (and believe me, a few things have not been all that great) get to me or affect me. He'll have to deal with whatever consequences his actions bring upon him, not me. I am done. DO YOU HEAR ME??? DONE!!!

So, I am laying here in bed last night, watching tv. It's bedtime and I had taken my bedtime meds, but was watching a tv show I like and I got to paying attention to the theme song and really liked it. I at first thought it was old school David Bowie, but after doing some digging, found out that it wasn't him after all. It's a group called 'The VLA'. The song is 'When I am Through With You', I particularly like the chorus. Now, I will put a disclaimer here and say this isn't directed at any one person. However, if some person should see this and hear the song and pay attention to it, maybe it will send this person a message of sorts.

As the sign I saw in the mall last weekend said "If you can't be nice; just leave!"

And as always, here is the song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNU2nOo1EwM

Thursday, January 1, 2009

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

Happy New Year to all of you! Or as we say in the south, to all ya'll!! I hope that each and every one of you had a great Christmas and if you went to a New Years Eve party last night, a great New Years Eve!

I myself went to a New Years Eve party at a friends' house. I had a good time, but came home just a little before midnight. Got the dog walked, it had just started to snow, and was back inside the house to see the ball drop in New York City. The party was nice and I enjoyed meeting some new people, but I wanted to be home before midnight for my reasons.

This was my first new years eve in 19 years as a 'single' gal. I put 'single' in little quotes because I am still married, although separated, and the marriage is ending. It was hard in some ways (another reason I wanted to be home before midnight), and yes, I did cry a little bit, but they were just mostly small tears. I was on the phone with my parents when the ball dropped and I said that this year was going to be a big year ( I turn 40 this year, my marriage is ending, I am back in school etc), and my mom said it would be my best year yet. I hope that she is right. I need a really good year.

Last year was a year of a lot of heartache, changes, and growth. In many ways I hated last year; In many ways, I was glad for what all of that brought forth. I grew in God in amazing ways (still am) and He is doing amazing things in my life and I am so thankful for that. Last year I found myself at a new church that brought new friends and great support with all that I have been through. I am so thankful for all of that.

Last year brought my return to college after a 18 year absence to finally finish my bachelors' degree. I got through fall quarter with a 3.0 GPA and winter quarter starts this Monday (5th). I am taking 9 hrs (2 classes) this quarter. Things are going a little slower than I wanted, but it is better this way I think, because I am able to adjust in small increments and concentrate well and do well.

Last year brought another nephew into my life. It was a surprise for every one, including his mom and dad! They had not planned for him to arrive until this year, but surprise!! We are glad to have him; glad that he was born healthy and easily. I got to spend some time with them over this past weekend and they are both growing so fast! I cannot get over it! This new nephew is going to be my little linebacker! He has my big German bones and is more leggy, like me, than his older brother; the older brother is tall (and I do mean tall!) will be my basketball player. He is built more like his dad and is so skinny!! They are both good, sweet boys though and I love them both very much.

Last year, late in the year, brought my cousin home from his last tour of Iraq. He has a few more months in the Army and then he is done. I am so proud of him and all that he has endured and accomplished, but I am glad that he is done. This last tour was his groups' longest and hardest on those of us left here at home. I prayed a hedge of protection around his specific little group, and to my knowledge, they didn't lose anyone this tour! Praise the Lord!

As many of you know, late in the year, we lost grandma. In some ways, I was surprised, and in some ways not. She was 94 yrs old after all. I will miss her, but know that she is happy in heaven and young and beautiful again. And I know that she'll keep an eye on me like others that have gone before her from my family.

This year, I am going to continue with my college pursuits. I hope at some point to finally find a job (its been so tough out there!). I hope that God will continue to grow me and continue to do the amazing things that He has already been doing in my life. I want to get my back healed (which we are working on) and get back to my workouts; I miss them and I don't like the shape my body is in. I have only been able to not do them for about 6 weeks and have noticed I am losing all that toning and strength I had worked so hard on. I hope to be a better person this year, a better friend, a better Christian, just better over all.

I hope that each one of you will accomplish what you want to this year. I hope that each of will grow in God. Will grow in your personal life. I hope that this year will bring each of you all that you hope for in your life.

Ok, so now I need to find a song. I am not going to pick the usual new years song. To me its too sad and I want something upbeat and happy. Something that supports what I hope this year will bring for me. So, I am off to find a song. Be back.

Ok. Here is the first song. It's probably one of my all time favorites and I like the way this group does it.

"Amazing Grace" by IL DIVO
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMVxzEueJ6A

"Hallelujah" by IL DIVO
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2SZ-nCBmsU

"Fly Me to the Moon" by Frank Sinatra
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rAsoLm1Ges